On the day of Jean’s passing, I received several calls and text-messages. They all asked the simple common question of how she died. Before I tell you how she died, I’d like to tell you how she lived.
I don’t remember how I got to know Jean. That was about ten years ago. But I do know that she was the one who introduced me to the world of coupons that we all love so much today. I remember that she used to bring a few coupons and give them to our co-workers at Mercury branch 9. In return, I gave her coupons that might be useful for her while she was under the influence of intense medications. One of them was for her favorite Souplantation. One morning she called me and said, “Sonny I don’t eat coupons. I eat real Souplantation.”
You know how technology advances so fast these days. But there was a little problem with Jean. From time to time I made calls to her but she didn’t answer. When I saw her the next day, she said she picked up my message a few hours (sometime days) later. I told her I never heard that the phone message transferred that long. She said probably my phone or the provider was not working right. I suggested that she just replace that phone plan. For Jean, it took a long time to do so. She changed the plan months later. That is Jean!
For the past several years, Mercury has drastically changed its customer protocol. Long before that, Jean consistently demonstrated her astonishing customer friendliness, like taking and responding to calls. We all noticed her willingness to help all callers and even take extra steps in eliminating some difficult issues. Her motto is, “Be patient, and pay attention to their feelings.” It influenced us a lot! Thank you for opening my eyes, Jean.
On one morning in the Spring in 2008, Jean brought me the bad news that she had been diagnosed with a deadly cancerous disease. After a series of tests, it was determined to be an advanced stage of an aggressive tumor. She was in and out of work frequently since then. But she seemed the same to everyone working here. We all even forgot of the disease she had been quietly fighting for years. Even between chemotherapy treatments, she once called me to ask how to get treatment for her brother, who had an acute illness. Most of her calls were about her siblings and relatives; and rarely about herself. She is the most caring, considerate and compassionate woman I have ever known.
On November 10, 2011, I received an important email from her. “Hi Sonny. I met with my new oncologist. Before we met, a nurse practitioner explained my recent results. They are not good, Sonny. When I asked her how much more time I have, she told me I only have six to twelve months to live. Sonny, how this NP say something about that would turn your world upside down.” I believe she might tell her family but sure that she will keep the fear to herself. From then on to her final days, she no longer allowed the visitors. My heart was broken when I heard about it. But we call and texts.
I’ll share with you excerpts of a few of the conversations:
1/23/12 (2:01p): The reason I’m going there is to say goodbye to everyone.
1/26/12 (5:54p): My fever is on and off because of inflamed liver (from chemo). I have severe back pain, joints and muscle pains also. Am not giving up this battle.
1/26/12 (5:49p): I know God has a purpose for me and I believe. He will set me free from cancer.
1/31/12 (9:20a): I am trying hard to be okay. I am still in pain though. I just don’t want to accept the visitors at this moment. I need my time. Sorry my friend. I hope you understand.
2/9/12 (10:45a): How are you doing? How’s Jim, Coni & Nancy Fox? I can’t go there because I feel nauseous and dizzy with meds.
2/10/12 (2:12p): if u have free time, I have some trash to shred (it’s in the box) could u pls shred them for me? It’s in the back of my chair. I owe you a big time my friend!
2/17/12 (3:38p): Am supposed to have a dr’s appt today but I had it reschedules bec I am still dizzy and nauseated. My nephew already picked it up @ 2pm today. This was her last ever text I received from her.
On the evening of March 6th, I received a shocking message from Josephine that Jean was taken to the Emergency Room. When I arrived to the hospital, I learned she was entering into coma. She handed us a bag of important documents she was holding tightly in her hands and her memory was beginning to fail. I vividly remember that moment and will never forget how hard she was fighting. Although the doctors thought she would survive only another day or two, she prevailed for nearly a week. During her last days, she was so beautiful. She fearlessly embraced the pain and suffering she had been enduring for so long..
When I visited her on the evening of March 10th, she was already in a deep coma. Her loving family had been exploring all possible ways to sustain her life. I think that’s the day I gave up my hope for her survival. She was so weak but had a very calm expression on her face.
At about 7:57pm on March 12, my dearest friend gave herself to the God she trusted all her life. Even though I had expected the inevitable, my mind went dark for a moment. She left this world leaving us with one important message: Care for your family, be patient, forgive those you dislike the most, and embrace life with fearlessness. She set a wonderful example for all of us.
My dear friend, all of us here have been deprived of you for (8) days, (14) hours and ( ) mins. I find the world is so strange without you. There were times that we didn’t agree. There were things I failed to help you with. Now I truly miss the times that we will never share again. Please forgive me if there were times that I was unreasonably demanding of you. I looked at you yesterday, Jean, and realized how very peaceful you are now. Goodbye, my dearest friend!
Thank you, and may God be in peace with you all.
